we told the kids about the divorce on tuesday night. it was horrible. i haven't written about it until today, and i don't know if i'll make it through. rylee was the first to react. as long as i live i don't think i'll remember anything as horrible as watching him crumple into tears the way he did. we all cried. as much as jenn and i tried to reassure them, it was just painful. they've been watching another couple we know go through a not so nice seperation, and i think that is their immediate perception of divorce. hell, i think most of the time it is the norm. i'm so worried about all this. it just makes me question everything. i'm not regretting our decision. this is the way that it is. i just don't want them to get hurt. to think this isn't going to hurt them, however, isn't very realistic. it's going to take time. each day there is some other weirdness that rears it's head, and puts my brain into a spin. most of the time i just walk around work in a daze- more so than before. i'm so tired. more later...